Visions of the Future

Here is an actual conversation Carter and I had tonight as he was falling asleep:

Me: "Carter, even when you're a big daddy with little kids, I'll still love to give you hugs and kiss your head."

Carter : "Uh Mom, I won't be having little kids because I won't be married."

Me: "Why is that?"

Carter: "Because I want to stay with you" (awwwww...isn't that cute?)

Me: "Okay, that's fine."

Carter: "Mom, do you think they'll have different phones when I'm all grown up?"

Me: "Yes"

Carter: "hmmm...more new phones from the network Verizon Wireless"

and then he fell soundly asleep.

Please save me from the vision of a 35 year old Carter in my basement spending every penny on technological gadgets. Please.

Sick Days

Here is something else I'm thankful for...NOT THROWING UP! I was sick yesterday and it totally sucked. Why don't mom's get sick days? Honestly. I needed a sick day WAY more yesterday than I ever did when I worked. As I look around the house I see two giant 7-up spills on the floor (cleaned up by Carter...I'll leave the rest to your imagination), every one of my purses dumped out, as well as every toy or piece of clothing the kids have used or worn in the last 48 hours. In addition, I'd started decorating for Christmas before the bug hit, so the Christmas bins are filling up every inch of floor not covered by toys and clothing and mail. (Why do we get so much crappy mail?!! I am so sick of magazines, ads, and general pieces of paper that I have to deal with!) That said, Carter was dream yesterday. He helped Spike while I bossed orders from the couch or the bathroom. He tried his very best to clean up messes. He didn't whine, cry or fight. He was awesome. And that, my friends, is why when I crawled back to bed at 9:00 last night, Carter was still up playing Lego Star Wars with Jeff and I didn't even care.

Slacker

Okay, I slacked on the gratitude posts. It wasn't because I wasn't grateful. Nope I was just a slacker. To make up for it, I'm going to try to carry on the theme through the rest of the holidays. So here are a few to get me started:

1. Primary Programs
Last year Carter slept through the program. This year, he promised he was "NOT going to fall asleep." He had a short little line, "I look like Heavenly Father (or Fadder as he would say)" and he sang a little phrase from the "I am a Builder" primary song. (I know that isn't the real name of the song, but it is all I can come up with). Okay, I have to say, he was the cutest kid ever. Despite serious effort not to be, we were late to church that morning, and Carter marched right up to his spot. He did a great job on his parts and wasn't naughty at all. Here is the best part though, every 5-10 minutes, he'd look at me (on the back row in the overflow...why are we always late!) and wave at me. How great are waves from the stand?!!!! Honestly, they were like a drug. Can I buy that kind of happiness? Pretty much I cried through the whole program because I love that kid so much.

P.S. Did I mention that I love him a lot. and did I mention that Spike sang Carter's song right a long with him?

Horrible Comments

Spike is a really cute kid. He's spunky and vibrant. He's loving and adventurous. He also has food allergies. Food allergies are only one part of him. When they are managed well, they are an insignificant part. When not managed, they are perhaps the most important thing to know about him. Eggs can kill him. Other foods affect his GI system. If he has a few bites, no big deal. If he eats a lot, it is a big deal. He will be miserable. He won't retain calories. He won't grow and develop normally. Today I saw this article on KSL. http://www.ksl.com/?nid=148&sid=8632606. The article itself is benign, but the comments really bothered me. Posters made horrible comments about how "food allergies are thinning the heard" and "children with food allergies shouldn't be allowed in public." First, I was horrified by the negative tone. It shocked me. It made my stomach sick. It made me want to cry and then it made me mad. Then a more clear thought took over. Gratitude. I was overwhelmed with gratitude for YOU, our friends and family.

I do not expect anyone to make special things for Spike. It isn't a fair thing to ask of anyone other than Jeff and I. That said, more often than not, I see you reading labels for Spike. You have special "spike treats." When he was younger, you vacuumed and swept your houses before we came so he didn't pick up crumbs. You make separate space on the grill for Spike's meat. You are patient when I ask a million questions about ingredients. You limit your restaurant choices so we can feed Spike. When he's thrown up at the most inopportune times, you've smiled through your gag reflex and helped us. You've listened to Spike scream for hours and and you've still hung out with us. When I slack off and don't pay attention to Spike, you are extra eyes watching everything he eats. You are literally a support for me and safety net for Spike. Your kindness and attentiveness affords not just Spike, but our entire family, a normal quality of life. You've done all of this without our asking. You've done it because you care about our family.

I grateful he has allergies? NO! Am I grateful for your love and concern that allows not just Spike, but our ENTIRE family a higher quality of life? YES!!! Thank you!

Gratitude-renters

Last year at this time, I thought for sure our house in Heber would be sold by now. I was sure the market would have improved or that, somehow, we would have been immune to its crash. I was wrong. Our hopes of selling with a large profit quickly turned to desperation to get the house rented...FAST. Two payments, heat bills, and driveways to shovel quickly became overwhelming. Our renters are not everything that the neighbors would like. Okay, let's be honest, the neighbors hate them and call me regularly to tell me so. Still, so many people have lost their homes, and our renters allow us to make the payment every month. They shovel the snow and mow the lawn and apparently have really loud parties at night. Every month the girl brings me the rent more or less around the day that it is due. So today, when I deposited the money from our renters (that was only 2 days late!), I was reminded how grateful I am to have the house rented.

Squeezable Applesauce

"Squeezable applesauce?" you say? Ick. Whatever, it is glorious. You might think that it is overpriced and has to much packaging that will certainly fill our landfills (see previous post). You are probably right. I don't care. I love it. It is the perfect treat for the car. It makes no mess..NONE! Because it has to be sucked out of the container, there is no talking/screaming/bossing coming from the backseat. For little boys that still really want a bottle (I'm not naming names here, but the elmo sippy cup just doesn't have the same soothing power as a "bottle milk"), it is actually calming to eat. I'm sick of looking for these at the store, so I bought a case last night at Whole Foods. Go get yours.

Gratitude-Trash Day!

Last week we had a Halloween party. In preparation, I had a mania which resulted in frenzied cleaning, (i.e throwing crap away). Like any fun party, there was certain amount of trash. I remember making some comment in which I joked about not recycling.... the recycling center has had the last laugh. I'm not laughing any more. I'm not laughing because since Monday, the trash can has been full. It has been pushed down, crap is stacked in the garage, and I've considered driving around at night in search of construction dumpsters. Praise be to the garbage man who came this afternoon!

Beautiful Fall Days

#2. I am grateful for unexpected, beautiful fall days. After last week's snow, I'd all but given up on sunny afternoons. Yesterday, Carter asked if we could have a picnic outside. I agreed and we ate lunch on the porch and played freeze tag and Simon says. Later, Carter mixed up a batch of bubbles and we sat on the back porch blew bubbles in the warm, still fall air. Spike woke up and we fed the horses a bunch of old carrots. Scorpion and the mule (who's name we can't remember. Carter told me she didn't have a name, she's just a plain old mule) were making noises as they clamored for carrots. Spike thought the horse sounds were the funniest things he'd ever heard and would crack up every time. Soaking up the last of the fall sun was a great way to spend our afternoon, and I am grateful for it.

A Post?

Last night Ashley asked me if I'd given up on my blog. Well...I haven't posted for over two months, so maybe I should give up. Alternatively, maybe I could just check People.com a few times less during the day and update the blog. I don't know that I can catch up on months worth of life, so instead I'm stealing an idea from a friend's blog. This month, is "Attitude of Gratitude." I'm making an effort :)

1. I am grateful for cable TV and Monster Jam videos. Because of their existence, my boys will still snuggle me. While we watch Sponge Bob, I'm able to sneak lots of kisses on the head, tousles of the hair, and hug/squeezes while they are distracted by TV. I know TV is "bad" for kids, but in our house, it's pretty good for lazy mornings and big snuggles.

p.s-Carter told me that today in preschool they talked about what they were grateful for. His choices were, "playing with you and daddy" and "the park". How cute is he? I love this boy so much and I just wish time could slow down a little bit.

Grrr..

So I walked out to my garden yesterday afternoon. The garden is mostly a failure, but the potatoes were growing. I noticed a giant pile of dirt in the middle of the garden. "What happened here?" I thought....I investigated further to see beets ripped to shreds and two lone potatoes scratched and scattered about. Then I saw the culprit...chicken bones given to Zoiee the night before. Apparently, she dug up the garden to hide them. I threw it out in rage and was mumbling to myself about how I wished the stupid dog hadn't wrecked the potatoes. This is what Carter said to me in the sweetest, most sincere voice ever, "Mom, you should be happy. She dug them up and peeled them for you. That is so nice of her." Oh to see the world through the eyes of a 5 year old.

P.S.---I brought the "damaged" potates in the house (I couldn't stand to throw them away.) Spike asked all day to "cook the dog tomato (AKA-potato)". I finally cooked for him and it was a big hit. Thanks Zoiee for providing a snack for Spike.

Good Morning

This morning is one of those mornings when, well, I'm just happy. I woke up to Carter's coughing and general misery about 5:30 and while it is a bummer that he is sick, it was such a comforting feeling to know that I could be home with him all day. I don't have to try to decide if he is too sick for daycare or try to drug him to get him through the morning so I could work a half day. I haven't always had that blessing and I don't know that I always will, but I appreciate it this morning.

I took all week off from exercise and healthy eating last week, and I'm back on the wagon this morning. My body is screaming, but it felt fantastic to get out for a run this morning. It was cold felt like fall....which would be nice if it was fall, but since it isn't (or shouldn't be anyway) I really noticed my surroundings. That is code for, "I looked like crazy for any sign of impending doom...I mean winter". I didn't see any real signs of winter, but I noticed a lot of other things. I noticed a beautiful hot air balloon high above me as the sun broke over the mountains. I watched three sandhill cranes take flight from the field and cruise right over my head. I appreciated the carefully landscaped mountain yards that line the quiet roads. I heard the water running in the irrigation ditches. I smelled alfalfa and horses. I saw a mother hen scooting her chicks across the street. Then I walked into my house and heard the sweet breaths of my babies. My babies who just turned 2 and 5 and who are growing up much faster than I would like. I heard Jeff in the shower getting ready to work all day to take care of our family. The house is quiet now and I have a moment to myself to do whatever I want. I think I'll go snuggle my boys.

Cool enough?

Today is "church day." Carter is wearing a really cute blue dress shirt with little pictures of pirate skull and crossbones. As you notice, he is miserable. Apparently, the shirt is, as he put it, "not cool enough for me." The pirate pictures are, "not big enough and it doesn't even glow in the dark or anything." The pants are torture because he "hates the button". He did keep the clothes on, but is currently wearing bright blue crocs with his church outfit. They were the only things cool enough for him.

I am months behind on any posting. I think that is a good sign though. Being too busy living to write about it seems like a life well-spent.

In May we went to Hawaii. While there, we visited Pearl Harbor. It would be a lie to sa Carter enjoyed it. He LOVED it. Interestingly, he didn't love it in a "let me be an army man" sort of way, but he seemed to have a quiet reverence about it. I think this is, in part, due to the fact that he experienced it with Gil. Gil has a way of making history feel very real and special to Carter. For that I am thankful.

On Memorial Day (AKA Decoration Day) we drove to the Midway Cemetery. Carter instantly noticed that there were flags on the many of the markers. We told him that the flags signified the graves of soldiers. Upon learning this news, Carter begged to walk through the cemetery and learn the names of every soldier. At first I was irritated. It was late and cold and all I wanted to do was stop at the family plot and show our respects. As usual, Carter persisted. "Mommy, I want to know the name of those soldiers!" At that moment, Jeff and I both realized that Carter had the spirit of Memorial Day that we were both missing. He didn't want to look at flowers or decorations. He didn't want to comment on how beautiful the cemetery looked, he wanted to learn about the people who were there. What greater respect is there, than to take the time to learn the names of the men we never met, who sacrificed so much to serve our country and their families? We didn't see every marker that day, and we didn't spent as much time at our family's resting spot as we had planned. Somehow though, I don't think they minded. A four year old and his parents learned the names of a few of our country's heroes. I think it was the best Memorial Day I've ever spent.

Princess Gloves

I used to be a princess. As in, I was the kind of girl I pray my boys don't marry. I did nothing. I didn't shovel snow. I didn't work in the yard. I didn't do a whole lot around the house. I know I didn't help with the sprinklers or fill trenches at the last house. I would remember that kind of torture. I'm not sure when it happened, but my gig is up. It happened slowly, over several years. So slowly, in fact,that I was unaware what I was giving up. I asked Jeff why it ended and his simple reply was, "well, you actually started helping." hmmmmmm..... Usually I'm grateful to have traded my princess gloves for work gloves, but after a week of working in the yard every day, I find myself wishing for my princess days. Here are I few things I've learned this week:

1. Don't pick a rock pit as the spot for your gardens
2. Rocks will torture us for the rest of our lives.
3. Wheelbarrows (especially cheap plastic ones) are really hard to drive when they are full.
4. It REALLY sucks when you tip over your wheelbarrow of rocks.
5. Ash and Mike are lifesavers!
6. Spike at Grandma's = MUCH more work accomplished.
7. After your 4th trip to the nursery in 3 days, with two wild kids, they start giving you free things....just so you will leave.
8. Double what you think a project will cost...you might be close.
9. No matter how much RAID you spray, the damn ants will still steal your seeds after you plant them.
10. If you work outside long enough, you WILL see HUGE spiders and have to be brave. I've killed the biggest spiders I've ever seen this week.
11. Having the fence installed to contain Spike is money well spent.
12. Backing a 4 wheeler trailer is harder than it looks. (I know, I suck)
13. Having Carter bring me a drink of water, all by himself, because "mommy, you look firsty" makes the water taste extra sweet.
14. Watching little boys play diggers in the piles of dirt, makes all the work seem worthwhile!

Post-it

So this is not really a post...more of a post-it note. Carter was sick this weekend and this is how it went down. He entered my room about 6:00 AM, looked at me with a total "deer in the headlights/panicked face" and yelled, "Mom, I don't think I'm healffee (Healthy)," and then he threw up. It cracked me up. Only Carter would announce sickness in that way.

In other news, Spike is now obsessed with monster trucks. He asks for "ucks.." (trucks) as soon as he wakes up in the morning. Between reading the monster truck program, watching Monster Jam recordings, and sending his trucks down the slide, he has as full schedule. As a note, Carter has had the same Gravedigger monster truck for the last three years. It was in perfect condition. Until this week when Spike started playing with it. It now has lost the body and has a bent axle. Go Spike.

Yay for Me

This weekend I did something I never thought I would do. I ran/walked the SLC Half Marathon. I have never been an athlete. I have never been a runner. I have been thin before, but I have never been strong. Probably my most vivid memory of high school (I don't have many...most of high school I have blocked) was knowing that my death was almost certain as I tried to complete the 16 minute mile for Coach Stuart's PE class. I barely made it...like by seconds...and I can honestly say it was one of the worst experiences of my life. Last May I started a Mommy and Me stroller class and was so tired I had to lie down on the cement because I again thought I was going to die. Both experiences sucked.

In honor of turning 30, I decided this year was the year to change all that. I started "running" for the first time in my life in October and have slowly worked my way up. My only goal for the race was to finish and to hopefully not be miserable during the process. I have tolerated my training runs, but I haven't ever enjoyed them. So, imagine my suprise, when I couldn't stop smiling through the race. I LOVED it! I achieved my goal of finishing and enjoying the race, Two days later my legs feel good and I'm mobile. My time wasn't great, but I've come a long way from the 18 year old who nearly died of exhaustion on the streets of Randolph. Yay for me!

The picture above is of Jeff, me and my friend Janelle. Janelle is an inspiration as I don't think she has missed a workout in years. I'm glad to have her to motivate me! Thank goodness for peer pressure!

Cow Part II

I was hoping the cow was a joke. I was hoping it, like so many other big ideas, would not come to fruition. I wish this was an April Fools Day joke. It is not. There is a cow in the corral. It's name is Dinner. Carter calls it a "steak cow" and is counting the days until we can kill it. Jeff and I have tried to be gentle about the eventual demise of the cow. Jeff suggested that it would go to a place, where it would "put it to sleep" and they'd turn it into meat. Carter's reply was, "that won't work, they need sharp things." He then asked when we would "shoot it". If you ask him now, "we are trying to see if we can keep it alive until Thanksgiving and then we'll turn it into steak. I love steak so much." Good for Carter. I, on the other hand, am not sure I'll ever be able to eat steak again.

Ewwww

What a week. It began with our washer having a meltdown. Suffice to say there was a flood, some swearing, a call to the repair place (who couldn't fit me into their schedule for 2.5 days...WHAT!!!), more swearing, and then Jeff came home. Thank goodness for Jeff, who insisted on working on it until late that night and getting it fixed. THANK GOODNESS...because at 5:30AM the next morning I heard the sound all parents dread, the sound of your child vomiting. I'm not going into the details, but let's just say it was bad...really, really bad. I washed everything we own on the sanitary cycle. I sprayed Lysol everywhere, multiple times. We washed and "Germ X'd" our hands until they were raw. Carter recovered and we all seemed well. We saw the much anticipated Monsters vs. Aliens. We visited friends and family. It seemed we had stopped the spread of the disease. Nope, it was not to be. Six days later Spike and I and woke up feeling, let's say, less than ideal. Cindy called, she was sick and praying for her death. Gil had to come home from work to help the lot of us. What a mess. The laundry/lysol/cleaning continues...Apparently though, there is a silver lining. Jeff told me to be thankful, I "got a cleanse that people pay hundreds of dollars for for free." I will remind him of that if, and when he gets sick.

Tickets and Prayers

Carter has been working on a reward program. If he does good things (as in going to bed without a tantrum, getting ready in the morning without me having a tantrum) he gets tickets. The tickets are redeemed for the various desires of a 4 year old. So far he has purchased lots of computer game time, a checkers game, and a trip to Chucky Cheese. (By the way, on the way home from Mr. Cheese, he feel asleep in the car singing, "it's the best day ever" song from Spongebob. )

Last night, as Jeff tucked him in bed, this was the prayer that Jeff and God heard, "Dear Heavenly Father, please bless Grandma and Grandpa. Bless me that I will sleep well and earn tickets so that I can see Monster's vs. Aliens coming to feeaters (otherwise known as "theaters") this Friday. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen"

Yes, he actually said, "Coming to theaters this Friday." So help me.....

The Wheels of Time

I turned 30 last week and I felt old. It wasn't the wrinkles or the softer body, no it was the feeling that life is going too fast. A week used to last forever. A month was an eternity and anything beyond that was unthinkable. Now, I have suddenly reached a point where I have any overwhelming desire for everything to SLOW DOWN. I love this time in my life. I love having my children small and in my arms. I love arguing about who loves who the most. Last night, Carter told me he loved me more than the solar system....what is better than that? Our support network is strong. Gone are the days of having parents that don't know anything. Suddenly, our parents are our friends, mentors and accomplices. They are planted firmly by our sides in raising our children and surviving life's adventures. We have good friends that have seen us through the best and the worst. Jeff and I are at a point in our marriage where we love each other not only for our strengths, but for our weaknesses. We are a formidable team. Together we believe that our dreams are possible. The future is ours to have. We are healthy and strong. Often I am struck by the realization that this life is better than I ever dreamed it could be. I may not be able to slow down time, but I can make the time count.

Jr. High Ski Days

When I was growing up, we had "Jr. High Ski Day". It was the glorious day, a few times of the year, when the entire Jr. High would suit up and head to Beaver Mt. for the day. It didn't matter if you knew how to ski or not,you went.....and you had fun. It was before the days of helmets. Kids rocked the day in jeans. I don't know if I ever saw anyone in goggles. Maybe we had sunglasses? Probably not. The school loaded us on buses, packed us box lunches, and set us free. The entire day, including a short lesson (if you were shamed into taking one), rental skis, and a lift pass was $10. Free of parents and lacking common sense, the day was chaos. By the end of the day, coats were tied around waists and kids were skiing runs we had NO BUSINESS being on, taking sweet jumps when we could barely snowplow. Oh, the glory days.

Over the years Ashley and I have joked that when we ski poorly, it is a "Jr. High ski day". Last weekend, I had a true Jr. High day. Ash and Mike invited me to hike up Garden City Canyon and ski with them. I really wanted to go. However, I had no skins to skin in, so Mike volunteered to carry my skis while I went in on snowshoes. (Seriously, who does that...thanks Mike!!!). Then I realized I had no boots, so I wore my random winter shoes and gators that I got when I was 11. Hello, ghetto. Anyway, I was totally dragging on the hike up. I lost my hat when I sat down to fix my shoe. When it was time to ski, I got freaked out and had a mental breakdown. (Mental breakdown=me lying in the snow with my skis straight in the air). I was a mess. But then, just like those ski days from so long ago, it was totally awesome. I saw a view of the lake I've never seen before. I felt proud that I actually made it to the top. I felt even prouder that I made it to the bottom. I was out of my league and it was miserable and wonderful.

Cows?

Okay, I can't believe I'm writing this. I can't believe I'm considering it. I'm embarrassed for myself. That said, I am in need of help. Help that I never thought I would need or want. Here it is, Jeff wants to buy a cow. Not a cow as a pet or anything weird like that, but a cow to eat.

Go ahead, laugh, call each other and talk about how I've lost my mind, I'm cool with it.

Okay, get serious now. We know nothing about cows. I'm aware this is a bad sign. Never fear though, I know that my peeps (Rich County, I'm counting on you!) can help. There is a place for it to live, food (grass) and water available. We want to eat it in the fall. (Because we are freaking Little House on the Prairie.) We may have found an appox 600lb beef calf for purchase. Here are my questions.

1. What is a good price?
2. Can it just eat grass or does it need corn and grain through the summer?
3. Is it going to die or get sick? Is this a high maintenance undertaking?
4. Does it need a friend? What I mean is, will it moo all day if it is alone or just with the horses?
5. General warnings or advice?
6. Should we just say "f-it" and buy the meat at the store? I'm serious.

Valentines....belated

Nine years ago on Valentine's day, Jeff and I were counting the days until our May wedding. We skied the Beav during the day. I dragged Jeff to pick out dishes that night (ZCMI was going out of business). I have no idea what I gave him, probably nothing, but I remember exactly what he gave me. I received a red rose and a can of Almond Roca. It was true love. I was certain my future was filled with nothing but romance.

Fast forward nine years to this Valentine's Day. I got up full of high hopes. I tried to make the kids make valentines, but they couldn't focus. (I think Carter got burned out writing his name on all the Batman valentines for preschool). I tried to get them to deliver cookies, but they just lounged around. In a last ditch effort, I cut sandwiches into heart shapes. They were cute, really they were. However, I was informed that they were NOT the shape of normal sandwiches and Carter refused to eat them. So, what's a girl to do but.........



Yep, Monster trucks. Our awesome friend Brandon got us tickets and headed out to Monster Trucks on Valentine's Day. We've been a few years now, and I have to admit, my white trash self LOVES the monster trucks. Spike was terrified at first, but then totally loved it. Carter, is an even bigger fan of monster trucks than I am. He packed up his toy monster trucks and drove them on his lap through the whole show. There were tears when Blue Thunder lost his heat and also tears when the trucks took breaks. Other than that, it was a great evening. We purchased the program ($10!!!!) and it has now joined the ranks of the 2007 and 2008 editions as Carter's favorite books.

So, it turns out that Valentines day 9 years later isn't quite what I envisioned for myself. But when it comes right down to, it, nothing makes me happier than seeing my boys (all three of them) light up with excitement. How can you beat watching a four year old shake it to butt rock music? Is there really anything better than a toddler squealing and clapping? In my opinion, if I spent every Valentine's day for the rest of my life with happy, healthy kids, good friends, and a husband that loves me wherever we are, I will consider it a life well spent. Even if it is at the monster trucks.......

(Oh, and, just for the record, Jeff did take me out for a nice dinner the night before...so romance isn't totally dead)

Appropriate Footwear

Sometimes my Bear Lake upbringing becomes more obvious than other times. I spend my winter constantly planning for "what if I get stranded". I wear only long-sleeved shirts/sweaters/fleece in the winter. I have a space blanket, gloves, hats, extra coats and food in my car. If I'm going anywhere far (as in outside of Heber) and there is a spec snow in the western hemisphere I have boots and a flashlight. I don't like the car to ever have less than 1/2 tank of gas. For a long time, I thought this was normal behavior for all people. Jeff informs that it is not and that I am a freak. Okay, whatever.

I also realize that I am the only woman under 45 who wears tights and closed-toe shoes to church on Sunday and I have come to terms with that. I figure the building is hot and most people have traveled less than a few blocks. Therefore, chances of frostbite are minimal. I'm not sure why no one else is cold, but again, whatever. Last night though, I was pushed over the edge.

We had an opportunity to go to Solider Hollow tubing. Since we went at 7:00 and it is February in Utah, I bundled our little family. Even Jeff had on snow pants and gloves and boots. (Those of you who know Jeff know that he rarely has a coat or gloves. He is apparently immune to the cold.) As we got out of the car I consulted the temp. It was 28 degrees and there was approx. 4 inches of new snow/ice. We started up the hill and some idiot from BYU (I know this because of his sweatshirt and loud converstation about his FHE group) runs past me to get in line 2 seconds sooner. I was thinking what a jerk he was when I looked down. You won't believe it, he was wearing CHACOS w/ NO SOCKS, and NO MITTENS/GLOVES!! Are you kidding me? For real?!!!! How does that happen? These are the questions I need answered:

#1-Who wears chacos as their shoes during a blizzard?
#2-Who decides that they are an appropriate choice to wear through Provo Canyon?
#3-At what point do you say to yourself, "I have no socks, regular shoes, boots or gloves, I should go tubing!"
#4-What was the girl thinking that was hanging out with him?

Is it bad that every time he slipped or fell I smiled?

Skier

It was a big day today, Carter "graduated" ski school. He has been taking lessons with his fearless instructor Steve (or as Carter would call him, "Dave....I mean Steve") twice a week for the last month. I am amazed at his progress. On the first day he was super clingy and terrified. The second week, he would go so slow that it took them forever to go anywhere. Last week, he had a tramatic event involving the wind blowing on his face. Today, as part of Team X-Wing (him and Steve...guess who made up the name?) he fearlessly made wide pizza turns all the way down the little slalom course they set up. Through it all, he has loved the lessons and espeically the treats that he finds in his boots after class. (Thanks Grandma!) Here are some of my favorite lines from Carter during the lessons:

"Mom, do you know the worst part about lessons? You have to listen to your teacher"
Me: Carter, how do you turn?
Carter: "You just put your arms out and your skis know what to do"
Carter: "Did you know there are snow mites on the big mountain that make you fall sometimes? And you have to stand right back up and keep skiing so they don't bite you." (Don't ask, I don't know about snow mites)
Carter: "Mom, great news. The girl peed her pants two times! Bad for her, good for me. Now I don't ever have to ski with her again"

Here is a cute picture of Gil and Cindy and the skier. Thanks to them for making the lessons possible. I tried to con Carter into having lunch in Snow Park today, in honor of the occasion. However, he vetoed the plan and selected Dairy Keen instead. Good for him, bad for me I guess ;)

Light Up Shoes

It is a good thing my kids have grandmas. Without grandma, we would not have these fantastic light up shoes. Let me highlight their features:

1. Light up areas on the side and bottoms of the shoes.
2. Multiple colors of lights-these babies are red and blue. Pretty much, you could mistake Carter's feet for the lights of an emergency vehicle.
3. They are navy blue, black, electric green with white accents. You CAN not miss these shoes.
4. They have a bit of a high heel. This feature is awesome. Pants that are a little bit on the short side instantly become floods.
5. Size 11.5. This is a half size bigger than our regular size, so they will last a LONG time.
6. Carter reports that all of the kids at preschool LOVE his shoes. Apparently Miss Sherilyn really loves to see them light up under the table. (I bet)

So, thank you Grandma for letting Carter have the coolest shoes he has ever owned. He would not have them without you :)

(Really Grandma thanks for the shoes, even if they are light ups)

The Verdict

The pediatric GI called this afternoon and the verdict is in...Eosinophilic Esophagitis. If you are curious, here is link http://allergies.about.com/od/foodallergies/a/ee.htm After talking to the doctor, I've decided that this sucks, but we can deal with it. The plan is to elminate soy from his already restricted diet. That means no soy, gluten, dairy, eggs, or peas. I'm sure there will be a learning curve to this, but I hope that the main change will just be from soy milk to rice milk. Fortuantely, he already eats very little processed food, so maybe this elimination won't be as hard as the others? Keep your fingers crossed. In addition, he will begin with a systemic steroid for the next few weeks and then move to a topical steriod. The hope is that this will clear up the inflamation so that he can handle food better.

Thank you so much for all of your concern and support over the last week. The process of waiting and worrying was overwhelming, lonely and draining . Your support and love made the process easier. Often, I find myself worrying that I've done something wrong, something to cause Spike suffering. Your sweet comments and emails helped me to find confidence in myself and my ability to be a good mother to my boys. Thank you for being our friends. Thank you for loving us despite all of our shortcomings. Thank you.

So I was Wrong

Yesterday morning, we braved terrible roads, early morning hours and a 17 month old without a bottle/breakfast, to take Spike to his endoscopy at Primary Children's. This test was ordered in the end of October and we just got in this week. (As a strange coincidence, it was on this day two years that we saw the first extensive ultrasound of Spike). I've been dreading this test for a number of reasons. First, I am just a nervous person and the thought of putting my baby under general anesthesia and handing him off to people I don't know is scary. Second, I have been convinced there is nothing wrong with Spike and this is a waste of time and money. It seemed ridiculous to spend a fortune and put Spike through an ordeal to find out what I already knew, he is healthy.

Well, after two chats with the pediatric GI, a trip to the "consultation room" and a long time in the recovery room, I can say it, "I was wrong." There is something wrong with Spike's esophagus. We are still waiting on some biopsies to make a final diagnosis, but most likely he will have a course of treatment that may involve limiting his diet further and introducing steriod therapy. Honestly, when the doctor was talking, I felt like I couldn't even listen because I was so shocked there was actually something wrong. To be even more honest, I'm still not sure I believe there is anything wrong, even after seeing the pictures, reading the literature, and talking to the GI. Spike has been doing so much better lately that I just can't get my arms around it. I guess I think the pathology will come back that all is well....although the doctor's comment to that idea was, "it is highly unlikely." Whatever, just because he's been to medical school and in practice for 25 years he thinks he knows more than me. :) j/k. I feel like the guy in Dumb and Dumber...."so, you're saying there's a chance".

Anyway, the best part of the story is Spike. Even under icky conditions, the child was 100% spunk. While waiting for the anesthesiologist, he was throwing toys and being wild (while I recieved dirty looks from all the other parents). When he came out of surgery he was "agitated" to say the least. He held his breath for 30 seconds and turned blue, requiring supplemental oxygen, because he was so mad. Every time a nurse would come he'd hold up his arm with the IV and scream "ting, ting". Meaning, "TAKE THIS THING OFF MY ARM!" What can I say, the kid knows how to win friends and influence people.

I had a picture of Spike in recovery to post, but for some reason it won't load...maybe I'll try again later. In the meantime, I realize what we are going though is NOTHING in comparison to what millions of parents endure every day. Even so, if you have any extra time in your prayers, throw in a wish for Spike.

Seven Things

My friend Kristen tagged me to do this. It seemed like a good way to start the new year with some reflection. Who knows, maybe I can turn some of my "can nots" into CAN'S this year!

Seven Things I CAN do:
1. Cook 3 meals a day that are gluten free, dairy free and egg free.
2. Read for hours.
3. Make good chocolate chip cookies.
4. Run 2 miles (which is 2 miles more than I could a few months ago).
5. Tune out noise and chaos.
6. Save a lot of money grocery shopping with coupons (Embarrassing, but I love it).
7. Dance crazy with my kids to loud music.

Seven Things I CAN NOT do:
1. Clean when there is something fun to do with my family.
2. Watch movies that are scary or uncomfortable.
3. Stop worrying.
4. Make everyone happy.
5. Back a trailer.
6. Ski moguls.
7. Do a cartwheel. (don't ask why, I just can't...and I've really tried).

Seven things that attracted me to Jeff:
1. His faith.
2. His optimism.
3. His humor.
4. His generosity
5. His love for his family.
6. His dedication.
7. The way that everything feels better when he's with me.

Seven things I say often:
1. Spike, No, NO, NO!!!
2. Where is Spike?
3. Carter ask again the right way.
4. I love you SO MUCH
5. Be careful.
6. Whatever
7. Bummer

Seven People I Admire:(how do I answer this? I admire something about almost everyone I know!)
1. My Mom
2 Ashley
3. Jeff
4. Cindy
5. Krysti
6. My Nana
7. Grandpa Dick

Seven Favorite Foods/Drinks
1. DIET COKE!!
2. Gyro's
3. Hamburgers in the summer
4. Treats, any kind.
5. Callaways Santa Fe Alfredo
6. Eggs Benedict
7. Fresh veggies from the garden

Seven People I tag:
Anyone who wants to do it. It's harder than you think!

wheew.....

I am back! We have had a crazy month. Have you ever seen people moving everything they own in the middle of a snowstorm and you think to yourself, "Who in their right mind would do that?" Well, I have the answer, me. We began moving on the first real snow day of winter. Special thanks to Ash who braved Parley's canyon to help us, Kevin who sacrificed his body when he fell/slid down the snow/ice covered trailer door carrying our couch, Gil and Cindy who watched the kids, and my mom and dad who came down the week before and helped us pack, mom who came down the next week to help me clean the old house. We are "mostly" moved in. What that means is, the stuff we use is unpacked. The boxes we have moved with us for the last 8.5 years are, well, still in boxes.

I had planned on getting out Christmas cards with our new address, but that was a dream that didn't happen. If I had your email address, I sent you a dorky picture and the new address. If I didn't, here is the picture anyway. Send me your email address at audrey.drury@gmail.com and I'll send you our contact info.